How to Make New Friends by Reading Body Language

body language
Understanding nonverbal cues and behavioral patterns when meeting new people is a necessary trait to obtain, according to Dimitrius. She emphasizes the importance of observing body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice to gain insights into a person’s mood, receptiveness, and potential biases.

In her book, she offers techniques for reading people effectively. This involves paying attention to microexpressions (brief facial expressions that reveal emotions), gestures, posture, and eye contact. These cues can explain a person’s feelings, intentions, and reactions.

Ever wonder if someone is genuinely listening to you? Dimitrius Dimitrius suggests that engaged listeners exhibit open body language, maintain eye contact, nod in agreement, and ask relevant questions. Passive or distracted listeners might display closed body language (crossed arms), lack of eye contact, and minimal engagement.

If you fear someone is not being genuine with you, Dimitrius advises looking for “Duchenne smiles,” which involve both the mouth and the eyes. Genuine smiles typically involve crinkling at the corners of the eyes, demonstrating sincerity and positive emotion. This contrasts with forced or polite smiles that affect only the mouth.

Dimitrius’s expertise also extends to detecting potential deception. She emphasizes clusters of behaviors that indicate possible dishonesty, such as avoiding eye contact, fidgeting, inconsistencies in verbal and nonverbal cues, and overly rehearsed responses.

Want to know more?

Learn to read body language. You’ll have a better idea of what someone is telling you…

  • When someone smiles, look at his/her face—genuine smiles crinkle the eyes.
  • A tilted head and wide-open eyes suggest a willingness to listen.
  • Someone who is biting his lips may feel he is being criticized.
  • People cross their legs when they feel defensive and their arms when they want to be convinced.
  • Leaning back shows friendliness—or feeling in control.

Helpful when meeting someone new:

Establish rapport by mirroring some of his signals, such as leaning forward or smiling. Or use the same body positions.


jo ellansJo-Ellan Dimitrius, PhD, is a jury consultant and coauthor of Reading People: How to Understand People and Predict Their Behavior-—Anytime, Anyplace.

Dimitrius is recognized as an expert in the field of jury consulting and behavioral analysis, particularly in the context of legal cases.  She is best known for her expertise in reading people’s behavior, especially in legal contexts. Dimitrius has been involved in numerous high-profile cases, providing insights into jury selection and strategies for attorneys.

Dimitrius gained widespread recognition with the publication of her book “Reading People: How to Understand People and Predict Their Behavior – Anytime, Anyplace.” The book delves into the psychology of human behavior, offering practical insights into understanding and interpreting nonverbal cues, body language, and other indicators that reveal people’s thoughts and emotions.

One of Dimitrius’s significant contributions to the field is her work as a jury consultant. She has assisted attorneys in selecting jurors, analyzing potential jurors’ behavior and attitudes to predict their potential biases, and strategizing for trials. Her expertise in reading people has been applied to help legal teams build persuasive cases and understand the dynamics of a jury.

It’s important to note that while Dimitrius has earned a reputation as an expert in reading people’s behavior, like any professional, her opinions and assessments are subject to individual interpretation and differing viewpoints.